At first, I thought this was all my fault. I thought I was to blame. BUT when I let time pass, so that I could observe things and get more information, I knew that I was never the reason behind all of this. In fact, none of this was even about me.
The things that went on with them were a big BLUR to me! I could never put two and two together. I was never told the truth, I would never tell the truth, but as I stated before I let time pass, so I could figure more things out. I, for sure figured MORE and MORE things out.
In the midst of this huge chaos, I felt like I could fix it all. I felt like I could be the glue that would make this stick together again. I felt like I was doing the right things, but for the wrong people.
I felt as though I could fix this. Being that I knew I wasn’t the reason it was broken now, but the people I was trying to help still blamed me and wouldn’t hear me out.
As mature as I wanted to be, no one knew my intentions. I thought if I went about it this way, people would think that I did it for all of the wrong reasons. Different people had different pieces of information to give me, except the people I wanted to hear it from.
Little did I know, everybody was on the outside looking in. Once I told myself that and really understood it, I chose a new route. This one had bumps, mistakes and exits… The only new thing that I tried, was keeping everything I found out and knew private!
I soon got off that route, and decided to choose a NEWER one. This one caused me to be the passenger and NOT the driver. I decided to keep it that way. To this day, I wish peace and platonic love to this situation that still remains broken. Hoping one day it will be fixed.